Jan 31 2012

Tuesday 31 January 2012: Brown

I don’t think the owners of these are coming back. They have been sitting on this railing for over a week now. One mitten, one glove. Not even a pair.

And now I’m playing MW3 with the guys from work so no time to blip.

you: you know what else is brown? Poo. Which is what this photo is.
……
you: hello? hello? I don’t believe it. He’s gone off to play kids games on the playstation

……………
Texas : Say what you want


Jan 30 2012

Monday 30 January 2012: cat blip alert

One of those days.

Slept in. Train cancelled. Next train late. No progress at work. Home. Cat stuck on roof. Cat somehow disappears from roof while I freeze my nuts off looking for her on roof. Can’t find cat. Go inside. Cat asleep on bed. Curse cat. Exercise. Eat chocolates. Watch top gear. No photo. Too tired. Cat blip.

you: and not even a cute cat blip.
me: nope.
you: you really couldn’t have got something better?
me: apparently not. It was light when I left work today though. So it won’t be long until it’s no longer indoor blips.
you: lets hope not. Hang on, you were late in, yet left and it was still light?
me: today? Yes.
you: perhaps accounts for the lack of progress?
me: like I said, it was one of those days.

………….
tsfb
Dean Martin : On the street where you live.


Jan 29 2012

Sunday 29 January 2012: Carnifex

Mum and dad brought boxes of my old toys up with them when they came. This was one of them. I’m sure the baby will love it.

I helped out some volunteers that look after the trails in the local woods today. It’s only the end of January and that’s me done my community service for 2012 already. Result. I can put my feet up now.

you: all baby toy purchasing rights are hereby revoked
me: aw but I haven’t even bought anything yet!
you: but you think some bit of metal, probably lead based, that you painted as a kid is a suitable first toy?
me: maybe not first. Second though. And I didn’t paint it as a kid, I was about 20
you: I was talking mental age, not physical. What attributes does this have that would make it a good childs toy?
me: well, it’s a Carnifex, a "living engine of destruction". I bet he’s harder than any other toys this kids contemporaries will have. And you could shorten his name to Carny
you: Oh now I see. because you could give it an almost sweet sounding name like "blanket" might become "blankie".
me: Exactly!
you: see my first comment.

…………..
tsfb
Keane : Everybody’s changing. (the only song I can beat the missus at on songstar)


Jan 28 2012

Saturday 28 January 2012: Blink

Mum and dad came up this afternoon. We went to have a look round Callander House. I’ve lived here 12 years and have never been in. More fool me, it was actually quite enjoyable. Lot of wandering around though making the missus tired, so here we have her taking a seat and yawning while being watched (Dr Who : Blink style) by a statue lady who appears to have been scalped.

Then we went for tea at Benny T’s. K&K came along too as they were on their way on holiday so were nearby.

Oh, and I can’t remember if I’ve linked to it before, but this video is freakin’ awesome. Love it.

you: Benny T’s?!
me: aye, what of it?
you: you took yer ma and pa to a chippy for tea?
me: we sat in.
you: ooh, fancy! Eh, naw. You did say one thing I agreed with though
me: really?!
you: aye, "more fool you". Fool.

………..
tsfb:
Sting : Englishman in New York. (because the break at 2:15-2:43 is one of my favorite bits of music…not that that helps me to sing it.)


Jan 27 2012

Friday 27 January 2012: Everybody say YAY!

I thought this looked a bit like a stick figure holding it’s arms aloft in celebration. Just me? Moving on then.

First time I’ve been for a wander in the woods since the storms. There’s a lot of damage in there. I counted the rings on one of the trees to see how old it was. 36. So a year older than me. I felt sorry for it. Why did I feel sorry for a tree?

you: Because you are freakin’ strange, that’s why.
me: Well, I do love trees. I wish I was an Ent
you: I’m going to ignore your tree based weirdness. Your "I think it looks like a stick figure" is odd too
me: really?
you: aye. Why does he have to be celebrating? Maybe he’s just run his car off the road and is trying to hail down some help?
me: well, I suppose….
you: or directing a plane in to it’s parking spot.
you2000: or an umpire at an ozzy rules match
me: aw jeez are you still still around
you2000: quiet, ent boy, before I get out my chainsaw and turn you in to logs.

…………..
tsfb:
The Bluetones : The Fountainhead


Jan 26 2012

Thursday 26 January 2012: Postcard from the past

Today I received this postcard, all the way from Australia. At first glance I thought it must be from Oz, as he’s the only person I know out there. Then I noticed the massive ‘2000′, and thought it a bit odd that he would send me a postcard from the past.

Then I turned over and it was addressed to me, and was signed off from you.

If the card is to be believed then you has made a couple of changes to my time machine, and decided rather than going to medieval times as I had planned, to go somewhere there was bound to be a good party: Sydney: Millenium night.

Unfortunately due to a Y2K bug in my design, you is now trapped in Sydney.

you: but I’m not. I’m right here.
me: aw dammit!
you: so now I can take the mickey out of you from the present, and the past
me: going by some of the berating on the postcard it would appear so.
you: and Sydney is 12hrs ahead?
me: 11 I think, but close enough.
you: so I can rip in to you 24hrs a day?
me: brilliant, just what I need!
you 2000: considering the 2000 on the card is massive you are a bit slow if it wasn’t the first thing you noticed
me: NNNOOOOooooo!
you: good call past me. This is awesome!
you 2000: high five future me/you
me: shouldn’t you be asleep?
you’s: shut it. We have tactics to plan.

………..
tsfb
Supergrass : Caught by the Fuzz


Jan 25 2012

Wednesday 25 January 2012: Best value in Edinburgh?

That’s a pint of real ale, and a scotch pie. How much do you think it cost? £5? That would be a fair guess, but no. £6? A bit steep, and heading the wrong way. £4? Nope, still too high. It was £3.50. In my eyes that’s a bargain. Where we normally drink we pay £3.30+ for a pint alone.

And where was it? Bennets of Morningside.. We visited way back on the 8th of June and promised to return. So tonight we did. And the staff were just as friendly as last time. Tonight it was busier and there was a nice atmosphere. We’ll be back again.

We (White Lightning, Napoleon, The Chemist and I) spent an enjoyable couple of hours rating from 1 to 5 all 130+ pubs that we visited on the poster tour. Only 11 were awarded the best score of 5.

you: you call that good value? You appear to have a pie and grey mush?!
me: grey mush? GREY MUSH?! That’s haggis stovies.
you: and why would I want that with my pie?
me: because it’s Rabbie Burn’s birthday. And yer in Scotland. That’s why!
you: so basically you had a lump of grey wrapped in pastry with a pile of grey?
me: that’s a fairly accurate description of a scotch pie actually. But to answer your question, I didn’t have one, I had two.
you: let me guess, because it’s as cheap as having just a pint at the normal boozer?
me: spot on. Bargain.
you: and they wonder why there’s an explosion of obesity?!

………….
tsfb:
Jim Reeves : I love you because. (skip to about a minute in for the start of the song)


Jan 24 2012

Tuesday 24 January 2012: The diplomat

Was today the best day of my life?
No

Was today better than yesterday?
Yes.

It’s a start.

Why was it better?
1)I didn’t have any frickin nonsense meetings
2)I started to get my head round a problem
3)Simon Mayo played Nick Drake’s Northern Sky.

you: was the problem "how to be less of a moaning git"
me: no. But I think I’ve succeeded at being less of that too.
you: really?
me: aw come on I’m trying out a new positive mental attitude
you: and how’s that working out for you?
me: it’s making my head hurt.

………..
tsfb
Nick Drake : Northern Sky


Jan 23 2012

Monday 23 January 2012: Just what the doctor ordered……….

………..a big white arrow to the heid.

Some days it might be welcomed. Like today. Why is it that something that takes up the majority of your waking life sometimes seems to be sucking all of the life force out of you.

Still, I got a nice walk in the sunshine.

And tonight I made a concerted effort to start trying to get fit again. I made up a playlist.

you: your concerted effort was making up a playlist?
me: well no. I realise I didn’t word that paragraph very well
you: nothing unusual there really. And the use of the word ‘again’ suggests either you have been fit in the past, or in the past you have tried and failed.
me: a bit of both really
you: oh, and if you ever do want a big white arrow fired through your head I’ll be happy to help
me: you’d probably have to join a queue.
you: even better. I can set up an ice cream stall, make a bit of cash, not get done for murder, but still get to see you with a big white arrow through your head.
me: sounds like a nice day out. Except for me.

………….
tsfb:
Foo Fighers : The pretender


Jan 22 2012

Sunday 22 January 2012: Donald where’s yer troosers?

Let this be a lesson to everyone. Blipping while drunk is not clever. Home from the wedding just the back of midnight, perfect, I can get todays blip out of the way. Kilt off. Kecks on. Job’s a good un. I must have thought. At least I was sober enough to avoid any censorship issues by sticking a pair of boxers on.

I am so freakin tired today. It’s ridiculous. I was asleep by half midnight and had 10 hours sleep. Flight was on time though so that was good. But then my pc crashed and wiped all my photos from my card as it was copying them. So I’ve spent a couple of hours investigating recovery options. Turns out photorec on ubuntu works a treat.

you: I wish you hadn’t bothered
me: what?
you: your telling me you spent a couple of hours to recover this?
me: I know I know. I quite agree. But I’m too tired to push the shutter button again.
you: and that’s a spinning bow tie isn’t it?
me: no!
you: aye right. Whatever. Freak.

…………
tsfb:
Deep Forest : Sweet lullaby


Jan 21 2012

Saturday 21 January 2012: Dark and Stormy

So. The wedding. I think I covered all the topics a man should cover with people he’s never met before. Namely births, deaths, religion and tax. Job done then.

And I think I handled the point where the (sober) missus said I was maybe getting a bit loud and should lay off the booze rather well. By going next door to the bar for another cocktail.

Being the only person in a kilt has it’s down sides. It meant the cunning ploy I tried when I went back to the buffet for a second helping was foiled:
"So, what options do we have here then?" I said in a "this is my first visit" voice, which was met with a polite "same as last time sir".

you: nice day?
me: aye good fun. A distinct lack of dancing though
you: which you tried to remedy no doubt?
me: only very briefly.
you: nice safe choices of conversation topic.
me: thanks
you: sarcasm! And you discussing religion? And at a wedding of all places?
me: it seemed appropriate at the time
you: idiot.

……………
tsfb:
Martika : Toy soldiers.


Jan 20 2012

Friday 20 January 2012: Not what I was expecting

2 things I wasn’t expecting today.
1) to have to pay 230 quid to cover our unpaid newspaper bill. Turns
out we hadn’t paid in almost 2 years. Oops
2) to receive a 2012 calendar with a picture of a Chinese lass in a
christmas costume on each page. Random.

Was getting my kilt gear packed up for the wedding tomorrow when I
noticed my shirt had oil stains on it. Nice clean golden engine oil.
Still not wearable though. Cue a mad dash in to town to buy an
overpriced dress shirt. 30quid?! Well stung.

you: Hardly a surprise to receive a calendar with chinese women in if you order it is it?
me: I didn’t order it!
you: That’s what yer gonna try and tell us is it?
me: What I did order was a bike light
you: With free calendar
me: No. No free calendar! Well, yes a free calendar, but I didn’t know
that at the time, and I certainly wouldn’t have expected anything to
arrive a month after the light.
you: Ok, whatever. I’m sure you’ll look lovely in your dress.
me: I said dress shirt. You know, with a collar for a bow tie.
you: I got bored at dress. So as far as I’m concerned you will be wearing a dress. And that’s the end of it.

………..
tsfb
Louis Armstrong : What a wonderful world


Jan 19 2012

Thursday 19 January 2012: Not vanilla slice

Imagine my delight when I opened the fridge (on returning from climbing) to spot the distinctive chevron markings of probably my favourite type of confection, the vanilla slice.

Imagine then how quickly delight turned to horror when I read the box and realised it was in fact a cream/jam combo. How dare it wear the uniform of a far superior cake. I am going to write to the manufacturer to complain.

The vanilla slice may be the most difficult cake on earth to eat without making a mess. But it owns a special place in my heart, and it should in yours too. Where else can you find congealed custard between two slices of what could be cardboard? Unless you have razor sharp teeth and a swift bite there is no way you’re getting away without squishing the custard out of the sides. Such fun.

Anyway. I still ate it.

you: cake chat 2 days in a row?
me: hmmm, looks like it eh
you: so your avoidance of sweet goods is going pretty well then?
me: I do appear to be struggling somewhat.
you: is this all part of your bid to appear on the biggest loser?
me: is it really that obvious?

………
tsfb:
Pet Shop Boys : It’s a sin.


Jan 18 2012

Wednesday 18 January 2012: Pink Jammy

Today I had the best Greggs Pink Jammy of my life (so far). And it was the best for 3 reasons.

1) I got a phonecall from Boab asking if I wanted one. This meant I didn’t have to break my new years resolution of attempting to not enter Greggs to buy cake at lunchtime.

2) I think that they have added 3 stripes to the icing. This lends the humble Pink Jammy an air of sophistication

3) It had a dough/jam ratio of approximately 50/50. Whenever I have bought them for myself I have been lucky to get 95/5 (dough to jam. I think if it was reversed it would be a tricky beast to hold and eat)

A couple of jars at the Abbotsford…hence the traditional abbotsford blip. I think he has the tassels on his cowboy hat round the wrong way at the moment

you: you think that stripes in icing add an air of sophistication?
me: totally. Stripes are the universal indicator of sophistication are they not?
you: I wasn’t aware of such a fact. And I’m fairly sure even if it was it wouldn’t apply to cakes.
me: next time you see something stripey just you have a wee think about whether it would seem more down-market without them
you: eh. Ok. I’ll be sure to do that. And since when were you the authority on which way round the tassels on cowboy hats should be?
me: since I got my HNC in "Cake decorating and Headwear"

………
tsfb
Arrested Development : Mr Wendal


Jan 17 2012

Tuesday 17 January 2012: All part of the plan

This is part of the time machine I am building. When I was wee I wanted a time machine that I could use to take a range rover and loads of fuel back to medieval times where I would charge for rides in the "awesome metal horse type thing that carries 4 people in the utmost luxury". Roll up roll up. But I thought I might get burnt for being a wizard. Did wizards get burned or was it just witches? Seems a tad sexist if that’s the case. So I might be better just using it to win lotteries around the world. Or I could licence the tech to Sony or someone.

Alternatively it’s just a random item sitting on the couch in my study.

$hit day at work. Made all the more $hit by the senior manager telling me I had to get something working not even knowing my name and calling me by someone elses.

you: what kind of warped mind would come up with going back in time with a range rover to charge for rides in it?
me: think about it, I’d make a fortune.
you: but there wouldn’t even be any decent roads!
me: hence the range rover rather than a maserati. See, I thought this through.
you: and where would you ply your trade?
me: at jousting events and stuff. I’d see if I could get a partnership going with one of the hog roast stalls. A range rover ride, a pork and apple bap, and a can of coke for a tenner.
you: I’m not entirely sure they had cans of coke in those days
me: a bottle then, same premise.
you: idiot

………….
tsfb:
Kylie Minogue : Confide in me.


Jan 16 2012

Monday 16 January 2012: A stitch in time….

…stops my keys falling out of my pocket and getting lost.

Can you see the size of the eye on that needle? No? That’s because I own a camera, not a microscope. Can you see the size of the end of the thread? The bit that is further away than the needle yet still larger? Yes. You can. So how the frick was I ever going to mend my trousers? Luckily I found a needle that was pre-threaded.

I found that I was talking to myself earlier when I walked in to the kitchen. "It’s ice cold, too cold, too cold" which just ended up with me singing vanilla ice. It’s not often I’m aware of myself talking to myself, but I probably do it more than I realise

Have finished Game of Thrones. So we started on Modern Family. Which is ace so far. A nicely done bit of family based comedy.

you: you shouldn’t talk you yourself. It’s the first sign of madness
me: eh…ok….that would be you out of a job, but thanks for the tip.
you: And do you wear green trousers to work?
me: no.
you: to go with your yellow soled "shoes"?
me: no.
you: so why were you trying to thread a needle with green thread?
me: it’s my pocket, who’s going to see?
you: it doesn’t matter. You should take some pride in your appearance
me: have you ever seen me?
you: good point. Green thread in your pocket is the least of your worries.

………..
tsfb:
Johnny Cash : Solitary man.


Jan 15 2012

Sunday 15 January 2012: Now I remember….

….why I don’t go to the cinema. It’s because as a general rule of thumb I don’t like people. Why have you chosen to bring crisps to the cinema? Why are you whispering? Why are you talking out loud? Why are you constantly checking your phone when it’s meant to be off? Why are you moving about so much? And worst of all, why have the last three people that have left the toilet failed to wash their hands, the disgusting gits?

For the missus bday we headed through to the bro in laws pick up her gift and say hello. Then to mcdonalds for a quick bite to eat. Then to the cinema. Then to Dusit for a delicious meal, as it always is.

you: why were you watching the film from the toilet?
me: I wasn’t. I just went for a post movie pee, and there were 3 folk in already, and not one of them washed their hands as they left.
you: that is pretty gross.
me: aye it’s rank. It’s nearly got me in a fight before.
you: pray tell
me: I was dancing in my pants in the red hot saloon bar in les arcs…
you: …. woah woah woah. What?!
me: eh, moving on, some drunk dude found it hilarious and tried to shake my hand and I refused. And he took offence
you: To be expected. Why wouldn’t you shake his hand?
me: exactly what he asked : "Because when I left the bathroom behind you earlier I noticed you didn’t wash your hands. Go away." At which point he took more offence. So I danced off in the other direction.
you: fair enough. Now backing up a bit, why were you dancing just in your pants?
me: I had my snowboard boots on too.
you: That’s ok then!? WHY?
me: the ‘just wearing pants’ thing detracts attention from my bad dancing
you: I’m sure in your tiny mind that makes sense.

…….
tsfb:
The Lemonheads : The Outdoor Type.


Jan 14 2012

Saturday 14 January 2012: Decisions. Expense. Decisions. Decisions.

This arvo we headed down into town to the new fancy pram and baby stuff shop. And the service was appalling. In that we didn’t get any. 2 members of staff just stood behind their desk blethering. We didn’t even get a hello as we entered or a goodbye as we left in annoyance.

So we went across the road to Malley’s Pram And Cycle Shop, where we were instantly greeted with a cheery hello and offer of assistance. He may have a website that looks like it was built in the 90’s but he knows how to treat his customers.

You can spend a lot of money on bairns it would appear. Is £470 for just a buggy a lot? It sounds a lot. But then it has adjustable coil-over rear suspension, and an anodised aluminium frame. It was obviously designed for when men go pram shopping unassisted. I’ll have to venture back alone so I can get it in the colour I want.

you: why on earth would a baby need a buggy with adjustable rear suspension?
me: why on earth wouldn’t it?
you: eh, pavements are smooth?
me: but woodland trails aren’t
you: I’m sure an unsuspended buggy with big wheels would manage woodland trails
me: but would it manage the mountain bike trails with bermed turns and drops?
you: I don’t think they are meant to. There’s a clue in the name : "Mountain Bike Trails"
me: if this kid is gonna be a pro downhill mountain bike racer it needs to learn the lines early
you: it’s gonna need a better teacher than you then.

…………
tsfb:
Belle and Sebastian: Me and the Major.


Jan 13 2012

Friday 13 January 2012: Lone Star

Except I don’t think it’s a star. It’s probably one of the planets right?

First run on the bike today, and it was good. Just cycled back from Stirling after being at the hospital for yet another baby scan (no wink and the gun today). When I was setting the bike up after getting it out of the car I was quite excited at the prospect. Certainly blew away some cobwebs. I’m still fairly sure that a pair of old umbro shorts aren’t appropriate attire for 2C temperatures.

Demolished a pot of M&S rocky road watching telly tonight. I have to stop the missus buying them.

you: you were wearing something else with the shorts I hope?
me: well aye, I had a couple of tops on
you: that’s awright then. I would have hated to hear Sally Traffic on radio 2 exclaiming that there was a pile up on the A9 caused by a pasty fat bloke on a bike.
me: so would I. But who are you calling fat?
you: the bloke that scoffed a pot of M&S rocky road.
me: oh, yeah, that guy.

………….
tsfb:
Sleeper : Nice guy Eddie.


Jan 12 2012

Thursday 12 January 2012: Ultrafire

Had a couple of very open, frank, and honest discussions at work today with a couple of managers. It was good to get a lot of stuff off my chest. Not in a good place at the moment.

On the plus side I ranked up a few times in MW3 tonight.

Out for a curry and a beer with Steven instead of climbing. Maybe next week will be the start of the climbing season.

These batteries are 18650’s. I’d never heard of them as a size until a few weeks ago. Then I hacked open my non serviceable camera grip to see what was inside, and it’s a pair of 18650’s. So one of the weekends tasks is to replace them as they are starting to fail. Another of the weekends tasks is to probably going to be working out what I’ve done when trying to replace them that means my battery grip no longer works.

you: who’s frank?
me: hardy har.

……………………..
tsfb:
The Cure : Boys don’t cry (wee life lesson for you there kiddo..bit rich coming from me though)


Jan 11 2012

Wednesday 11 January 2012: Who ate all the pies?

Could see the baby moving in the missus’ belly for the first time tonight. It freaked me out. A lot. So I am leaving town for a couple of months. I shall return when the baby has arrived and is at least potty trained, and has perhaps finished in higher education or a trade apprenticeship, whichever it chooses. (potty training not optional)

Met Honined for a bit of lunch today. Went to ‘Taste of Italy’ at the top of leith walk, and had a really nice pizza.

Then round to White Lightning’s with The Chemist, Napoleon, and Colin for more pizza and a beer or two to celebrate his (White Lightning’s) birthday….although he had no beer as he is ill which kinda sucks. Still, all the more for us.

Then home, where there was more pizza in the form of leftovers from the missus tea.

you: that’s your belly though and not the missus’ right?
me: no! What the hell would make you say that?
you: carry on with three meals of pizza a day and yer belly soon will look like that.
me: I’m working on it.
you: so it would seem. Still, climbing tomorrow eh, that’ll burn a few calories.
me: aye. Oh, eh, naw, hang on. We are starting our climbing year with a curry.
you: just like you finished it with a christmas dinner?
me: hmmm, aye.
you: lardass.

……….
tsfb:
Andy Stewart : Donald where’s yer troosers? (sorry baby, I’d had a beer or two and it popped into ma heid).


Jan 10 2012

Tuesday 10 January 2012: Whoops.

The other day I was on my way to Game to buy this when I decided that there was loads of stuff I had to get done, and when I had done it all I would eventually buy MW3 as a treat. So I turned round and went home….

…..where I went straight on to Amazon and bought it. Willpower at it’s finest.

Pi$h day at work. Never even got to the interview stage of the promotions I went for. Totally hacked off. I didn’t really expect to get one of the jobs, I did expect to get an interview. Annoying that for the last year or so I have been pretty much doing the job I went for. I’m even more annoyed that some of the folk I work with didn’t get an interview either, farcical. Sometimes working for a big company sucks.

you: I wouldn’t promote you either
me: any particular reason?
you: you wear trainers to work for a start.
me: anything else?
you: you moan a lot
me: anything else?
you: you’re crap at MW3.

………
tsfb:
U2 : Until the end of the world


Jan 9 2012

Monday 9 January 2012: Inconsistent

I went to put on my new shoes this morning for work (which would have ended this rather sad and demoralising run of shoe based blips), and noticed something was wrong. The laces are done up differently on each shoe. This was unacceptable, so I put my old shoes on, and here we are with yet another shoe based blip. Hopefully the last.

And that was the highlight of my day.

you: it can’t have been the highlight. Even your life is more interesting than that.
me: let me see. Train being cancelled?
you: nope, not interesting
me: next train being late?
you: dull
me: having a baked potato with savoury cheese and beans for lunch?
you: still dull
me: having sprout and coleslaw soup for tea?
you: I’m going to pray that’s a series of typos.
me: it wasn’t. Sorry, that’s all I’ve got
you: you really are a waste of oxygen

…………
tsfb:
Tom Jones : It’s not unusual Fairly sure the baby did the Carlton dance. Awesome.


Jan 8 2012

Sunday 8 January 2012: Once size fits all.

Except that doesn’t quite work with shoes does it? So it’s a shame that these aren’t my size. But I was getting fed up of looking, I liked these, they only had one pair left, did it matter that they weren’t the right size for me? Well no, obviously, as I bought them.

More telly today. Took the chrimbo tree down. Then went to ikea. Which felt like a very strange thing to do at 430 on a sunday afternoon.

What else was strange at 430 this afternoon was the sky. It was a very odd colour, making everything else look very odd too.

you: what kind of numpty buys the wrong size of shoes because they can’t be bothered looking any more?
me: me, it would appear.
you: how much too small are they?
me: too small? They’re a size and half too big.
you: what?! What kind of man has size 8 feet?
me: the kind that bound his feet as a teenager as he wanted to be a Geisha?
you: I’m going to assume, rightly or wrongly, that you are not referring to yourself. Ach well, you know what they say about men with small feet.
me: small shoes.

…………
TSFB :
Glen Campbell: Witchita Lineman


Jan 7 2012

Saturday 7 January 2012: A river runs through it.

Made some repairs to the roof done today. Granted one of the repairs was required as a result of me repairing something else…..when my hammer dropped a few feet it landed right in the middle of a tile and smashed it. Not a whole tile, that would have been to easy, it was one that had been cut to fit a specific location, meaning I had to cut a new one to fit said location.

Out for lunch with the missus. The Copper Top in Camelon. It was good grub too, we shall return, maybe skipping the starter next time as it was huge.

Watched the last 2 episodes of Public Enemy with Anna Friel. We both decided we didn’t like it much, so that was 3 hours of our lives wasted.

I think I’m a bit late to the party, but today we watched the first 2 episodes of Downton Abbey, man it was good.

you: not the freakin trainers again!
me: its symbolic
you: of what?
me: well, it’s a river of oil running through sand dunes. It’s symbolic of the west’s reliance on the desert nations for their oil.
you: oh do shut up. What it’s symbolic of is that you spend your entire life with yer fat @rse on the sofa watching telly, meaning you never do or see anything of interest to blip!
me: a bit harsh
you: it’s the freakin truth! I’m getting bored of your one line telly reviews.
me: mmm, you have a point. Oh, I forgot. Watched the next episode of Game of Thrones too.
you: you lead a sad life.

…………
Tonights Song For Baby (from here on abbreviated to TSFB):
Europe: The Final Countdown


Jan 6 2012

Friday 6 January 2012: Detail

The rx8 developed an oil leak approximately 5 minutes after it was serviced and MOT’d. Typical. Today was the first chance I had to get it checked out. So that’s gonna be £130. And 2 new tyres fitted to it today too, £240. All of a sudden the "we won’t sell it but keep it as a cheap runaround" has cost us more than a cheap runaround would have. Frickin cars.

Spent the arvo processing some photos from the hairdressers shoot a while back, time consuming.

Finished series 4 of Breaking Bad last night, ace. So tonight started watching Game of Thrones. Seems like it might be good, bit gory in bits already though so we’ll see how episode 2 goes before making a decision.

you: seriously?
me: what?
you: all you have managed to blip today is the eyelets of your new shoes?
me: I thought I’d do a study of them for the rest of the week
you: seriously?!
me: I freakin hope not. Something more interesting than new shoes has to happen over the course of the next week, surely?
me: let’s hope so for our sakes.

…..
tonights song for baby was Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini

you: I note you left that admission until after our discussion. Idiot.


Jan 5 2012

Thursday 5 January 2012: New school shoes.

Nowt much more to say really. Got some new shoes for work. Day done.

you: eh, they appear to be a pair of black Nike with yellow soles
me: how very observant of you
you: don’t get lippy with me boy!
me: well why are you pointing out the obvious?
you: you work in an office do you not? Trousers, shirt, and yellow soled Nike. Nice look.
me: thanks.
you: SARCASM.


Jan 4 2012

Wednesday 4 January 2012: Aw baws….

….not again. It’s been over a year since there was a drip in the garage, but tonight it’s back. Maybe the gales have knackered my repair.

Bit of a nothing day today. Got my passport sent off for renewal, made a lasagne, bit of exercise, bit of telly. The Biggest Loser UK has started, I couldn’t face watching it properly so sat and read the MySQL pocket reference while the missus watched it.

you: or maybe your repair was rubbish
me: nope, it’s a good repair.
you: obviously not seeing as it’s leaking.
me: it must be a different cause.
you: oh it must must it? Not quite true to say there hasn’t been a drip in the garage in over a year though is it?
me: it is, it’s well over a year
you: there’s a drip in there every time you go in
me: très drôle
you: is that sql? freak.


Jan 3 2012

Tuesday 3 January 2012: Party, sponsored by smirnoff

holy crap it was windy today. Got a new record gust measured on my weather station, and that was with it mounted on the fence, not even up on the roof. 72.3mph, at 8:26 this morning.

Why then, at 8:26 in the morning was I walking to work? I should have known the trains would be a nightmare. It turned up pretty much on time, then took twice as long as it should have done to get to town. Then terminated at the wrong station. No way I was walking right across town in that wind, there were bits of slate and signs flying everywhere, so I just went to the mothership instead. Waverley Station was shut nearly all day with no trains running at all, with no useful information coming out about when trains might be running again it was quite an annoying day. Welcome to 2012.

you: stop yer whining
me: I’m not whining.
you: sounds like whining to me
me: well it’s not. Oh, and for the first time ever I used twitter to try and find information, and eventually found it useful
you: welcome to the 21st century ya numpty
me: I just thought it was all about stephen fry and charlie sheen spouting nonsense
you: and it’s not?
me: no, scotrail spout nonsense on there too.


Jan 2 2012

Monday 2 January 2012: Where would I be without you.

A bit of visiting to drop off christmas presents this arvo while the missus was being a ‘lady what lunched’ then home. A lot of good telly on at the moment. We watched both episodes of Treasure Island today. Eddie Izzard as Long John Silver. Who woulda thunk it? And he was good too. Also watched another set of auditions for Got To Dance. The best of the lot were Prodijig, I thought they were freakin ace. Irish dancing brought up to date. Who woulda thunk it?

Ate half a kilo of stuffing and 6 yorkshire puddings that were about to go out of date. Not entirely sure that much meat agreed with my internals. Who woulda thunk it? And 20 minutes of exercise so that should have made a dent in it all….maybe not the half portion of macaroni the missus left that I ate too though.

you: bit early to be dropping off christmas presents for next year eh?
me: eh, aye, that’s what I was doing
you: aye right, late as ever. And who are you to judge if irish dancing is any good or not?
me: are you forgetting I watched Riverdance from Beijing on christmas eve?
you: oh yeah, instant expert. I see
me: well obviously.
you: you are an idiot. Who woulda thunk it? Oh aye, that’s right, everybody.


Jan 1 2012

Sunday 1 January 2012: Start as you mean to go on.

So we don’t know who won the customary hogmanay board game as I ballsed up the scoring by being crap at counting and taking extra money out of the bank to help me keep track and then forgetting which money I had taken out of the bank and which was mine. Ooops.

A grand night of food, games, booze and banter as usual. And a quick game of sensible soccer on the mega drive before bed. A blast from the past if ever there was one.

Took a leaf out of YearOfHappy’s book today. Stuck on some Foo Fighters and got on with some exercise.

The rest of the day has involved the couch and telly. The new series of Sherlock Holmes started, and was pretty good.

you: starting as you mean to go on eh?
me: aye.
you: sitting alone, on the floor, pouring yourself a drink?
me: well no, I was referring to doing some exercise for the first time in ages.
you: so like YearOfHappy you went out for a run in the cold, wind, and rain
me: well, not quite.
you: not wet or windy?
me: well, no, I only made it as far as the xtrainer in the garage.
you: fail
me: how can it be a fail? I nearly blew my heart up
you: indoor exercise doesn’t count.
me: whatever. Happy new year.