Nov 30 2011

Wednesday 30 November 2011: Lazy old sun.

This was taken at 8:44am and the sun still hadn’t cleared the horizon.

Good night at the boozer tonight….

you: I freakin’ knew it!
me: what?
you: you’d be straight back on the booze!
me: ha! Well you were wrong. I had 2 pints of fresh orange and lemonade.
you: and how does that make it a good night exactly?
me: cause we went for mercat nachos to check if it was just a one off duff bowl Napoleon had recently. And it must have been ’cause they were ace.
you: good. And i’m loving the amount of effort you have been putting in to your photos lately
me: ta.
you: SARCASM


Nov 29 2011

Tuesday 29 November 2011: Rising from the ashes.

I’ve finally realised I do have a purpose for the wee computer I bought over a year ago and then never used. I’m going to run xbmc on it. Result. It’s lain in this corner for months now, along with all the other bits and bobs that appear to have accumulated.

I managed to sleep upstairs even though it was windy last night. Very proud of myself.

you: aye congratulations. Managing to do what 99.999% of the population does anyway
me: does that make me normal?
you: not by a country mile.
me: aww. Why?
you: well for a start you appear to have a cuddly Simba living in the same corner as a random pile of electronic gear
me: no, silly. Not living in the corner! He’s guarding the corner
you: yet again, I rest my case.


Nov 28 2011

Monday 28 November 2011: Fail

I noticed blip were running a "Scotland the world over" thing. So quickly printed this wee flag off and found someone to hold it.

Then I read the instructions for the "Scotland the world over" thing.

Fail.

And it’s blowing a gale again tonight. Gonna try and kip upstairs through it though. One small sleep for man. One giant sleep for mankind.

you: shoulda read the instructions first
me: eh, hello? man, instructions?
you: aye well come on then
me: what?
you: change the photo for something better
me: too tired.


Nov 27 2011

Sunday 27 November 2011: Home time

We left the Ghillie Dhu at 1. The weather was freakin’ horrific. It was blowing a gale and absolutely tipping down. I don’t think I have seen rain blown around like it before. We were soaked in seconds, and there was a lot of cursing. Couldn’t find a taxi, couldn’t be bothered waiting on pizza, so just trudged back to Napoleon’s.

A couple of mugs of tea, a steak pie, and some toast with peanut butter, and all was well with the world.

Or it should have been, but at 5am I found myself in the dunny barfing, with stomach cramps, close to tears. It reminded me of the boxing day I spent in the foetal position on the toilet floor ill. Not good. I am positive it was the peanut butter.

Got the 8am train home and fired Strictly on. Harry and Aliona’s quickstep was freakin awesome.

you: aye it was probably just the peanut butter, not the massive amount of alcohol you imbibed. Idiot.
me: No. Seriously. I reckon it was the peanut butter.
you: No. Seriously. Idiot.
me: I think I might lay off it for a while now anyway
you: peanut butter or beer?
me: both.
you: don’t make me laugh!
me: you’ll see
you: aye, I’ll see wednesday’s blip which will read something along the lines of "good night at the boozer"….


Nov 26 2011

Saturday 26 November 2011: The final stretch

Done. Finished. Over. Finitio. Today we completed the pub poster tour that we have been doing over the last few months. Today cost us over £100 in taxi/train/bus fares, and had us right out in the back of beyond. But it’s done now. We finished up back where we started, in Teuchters. Finishing the tour off with a bottle of bubbles and 5 pint glasses.

In total I visited over 120 pubs. Napoleon visited over 130. Today’s finishers were me, Napoleon, Colin, White Lightning and his wee bro Ali. A grand day out. Not the same grand day out as wallace and gromit mind you.

you: so that’s it over. Now what are you going to do?
me: enjoy just being in a pub I like
you: you sound like you didn’t enjoy it all
me: naw it was all freakin awesome. I wouldn’t do it again though.
you: what’s next?
me: one barmaid said they had had the man with the guinness world record for most pubs visited in the UK in earlier in the week. That’s a title ripe for the picking
you: ha, no chance!
me: that sounds like a challenge….


Nov 25 2011

Friday 25 November 2011: Wild weather

The rx8 passed it’s MOT. Woo hoo. So now it’s the run-about. Just as long as we don’t do too much running it’ll be fine.

Took the little people out to see the falkirk wheel today. Wet and windy. Again. But the selotaped straw on the back of flat saffron at least meant she could almost stand up in the wind. The photos aren’t gonna win any prizes, but hopefully it’s what the bairns are after.

Yet another night with no exercise and lots of unhealthy food. It feels like it’s about 3 weeks since I did anything.

Finishing off the pub poster tomorrow. Quite excited about that. 9 Pubs to visit and we’re done.

you: no way you’ll manage 9 pints
me: why’s that?
you: cause it’s not just exercise you haven’t been doing. You’ve been slacking on the drinking front too
me: this is very true. And with this cold I have it could all go horribly wrong
you: I predict it will go horribly wrong and yer gonna be home in bed ill by 4pm


Nov 24 2011

Thursday 24 November 2011: The good blue ones.

It’s always the same. You go to the neatly organised utterly shambolic medicine cupboard shoe box and find the day and night nurse (other brands of 24hr cold and flu relief are available, see picture) Each foil sleeve is meant to contain 3 sets of tablets for the day, and one set for the night. Except they don’t. Without fail every pack you own will contain foils with 1 or possibly 2 daytime sets, and no night time sets. Until tonight….when I found a full foil set. But of course I only wanted to night time ones.

Still, at least the cycle is broken. Next time I find this pack it will have 3 day sets.

At least I have an idea for the next series of Dragons Den now though.

you: and it is?
me: I’m hardly likely to tell you am I!
you: don’t you trust me?
me: not really.
you: aww go on! tell me.
me: ok, it’s a shoe box that only dispenses the night time cold and flu tablets.
you: eh, I’m out.


Nov 23 2011

Wednesday 23 November 2011: Looks like a nice place for a kip. Right?

Wrong. So I kipped in a bed for the first time in months last night. And had a terrible nights sleep. The wind kept waking me up. It was because of the wind that I moved to the sofa ages ago. I should just have stayed there.

And I’m now getting to the pointy end of a bit of work and starting to get concerned.

And now the cold that has been threatening to kick off for the last few days finally has. And I feel crap.

And I missed out on beers tonight in the hope I’ll feel better for Saturday’s end of tour blowout.

What an awesome day this wasn’t. It’s 8:45pm. I’m going to bed.

you: is that grazia?
me: what?
you: your bed time reading
me: well it is grazia, but it’s not mine.
you: aye right! Ya big nancy.
me: I’ll admit that from time to time I’ll have a look through grazia
you: loser
me: only if there’s an important article in it though
you: what like? Sweat-shops in china? Protests against fur?
me: well no, I was thinking more along the lines of idle gossip about Kate Kate Katie Kate.


Nov 22 2011

Tuesday 22 November 2011: Idle hands.

Boab came over tonight with his bairns to give me a bit more practice with my lights. All grand plans of shot lists go out of the window when the kids are excited and running around! Didn’t do very well, but hopefully there are a couple of usable ones they like.

I think I might kip in an actual bed tonight rather than on the sofa. That’ll have been pushing 2 months of couch kipping now I guess.

My back is playing up again. Not a pain I’ve had before either which is concerning.

you: again, you probably just need to spend more money on kit to get better photos
me: yeah that’s what I was thinking
you: you really are an idiot. Learn to use what you’ve got first
me: mmm, that was my other option.
you: what do you think might be causing the back issues?
me: not sure
you: you don’t think kipping on a couch for months is anything to do with it? Idiot.


Nov 21 2011

Monday 21 November 2011: The little people

I have a couple of visitors staying with me at the moment. This is them. Flat Amber and Flat Saffron. I’ve to take some photos of them in front of famous or interesting places and send them back to my cousins kids for some school project or other.

Took the rear light cluster off the RX8 as it has got water in and is misted up. I don’t think that would help any with it’s MOT. What I’m not so sure about is the ring of rust on the outer edge of the rear disc brakes.

And that was my day.

you: you’ve to take their photo in front of "famous or interesting" places?
me: right
you: and you take their photo in front of a door at the top of your stairs
me: well obviously this isn’t one of the places!


Nov 20 2011

Sunday 20 November 2011: Broccoli and stilton

Out for a play on the local trails, then went to pick Jenelope up from the station. I gave her a bowl of soup.
J: Mmmmm broccoli and stilton?
me: eh, naw. Just broccoli
J: are you sure?
me: pretty sure, since I made it.
J: taste yours
me: hmm yeah, a distinct taste of blue cheese.
J: when did you make it?
me: tuesday night
J: are you trying to freakin poison me?!

So we had Philadelphia on toast.

Headed round to see Fat Mungo. Quite a time of it he and Mrs Mungo have been having. But he’s awright now….or at least not barfing due to the pain.

you: what the frick is this photo meant to be?
me: oh, Jenelope was helping me out with some lighting setups.
you: if this was with her helping I’d hate to see what state your shots would be in without her help
me: on of the heads wasn’t firing
you: more like one of you needs firing.


Nov 19 2011

Saturday 19 November 2011: Merry christmas. (2)

Colin and his missus and bairn popped round this arvo to get some photos done of the wee man. He was perfectly happy as long as he was standing anywhere that I couldn’t take a picture of him.

We were meant to be at the swamp tonight but Fat Mungo is in hospital with a ruptured kidney. I didn’t even know you could rupture a kidney. Anyway he was in surgery tonight so hopefully that’s gone well.

And Strictly should give up on the ’specials’. They always spoil the show. That’s the halloween one and tonights wembly one not been as good as a good ‘normal’ show. And yet again whoever is in charge of the shots that get used on that show needs fired. They are dancing. Close ups of their faces are not helpful. Random panning shots are not helpful. Lets just see them head to toe, and leave it be.

you: two weeks in a row you have blipped something to do with christmas
me: so?
you: it’s nowhere near freakin’ christmas
me: todays was just a test shot while I set my lights up
you: and you couldn’t find anything other than a cuddly reindeer?
me: no.
you: you live in a very strange house.


Nov 18 2011

Friday 18 November 2011: Broom broom

Picked up the new motor today. On the run home I averaged 59.9mpg. That’s three times what I get in the old car. Result. And it’s nice to drive. And it has toys on it that I haven’t had before. And…..

you: …… it makes you an @r$e.
me: eh?
you: you are aware that the general public’s opinion of bmw drivers is that they are @r$es?
me: well yes I had heard that
you: and this didn’t concern you?
me: well….
you: … oh yeah I just realised, everyone already thinks yer an @r$e so you won’t notice any difference.


Nov 17 2011

Thursday 17 November 2011: scammers

I pick up the new motor tomorrow. Hurrah

I’m finding that insurance is gonna be a bit more than expected. Boo

I remembered that I can’t use my no claims on more than one car. What a frickin load of $h1t that is! The scamming gits! I haven’t made a claim in 8 years therefore I should have 8 years no claims bonus on as many cars as I want until I make a claim!

you: so which of these is it? The pagani zonda R or the red bull touareg?
me: sadly neither. Which is probably a good thing as I doubt I could insure either of them
you: but your gettin’ on a bit now. I thought insurance came down as you get older
me: that’s just an urban myth. First they tell you it’ll come down when you’re 18. Then 21. Then 25. But it never does
you: maybe it will when you’re 40. Which is getting ever closer.


Nov 16 2011

Wednesday 16 November 2011: Cr-Ape

This is the cr-ape I mentioned yesterday. I think if Darwin were still alive such a drawing might make him wonder what went wrong with evolution. Obviously a cr-ape is much cooler than say a sea slug, so why don’t we see them roaming the streets instead?

Good night at the boozer tonight. First night we’ve seen The Chemist for a while.

Some worrying news from Napoleon though was that he and Esme had been to The Mercat for nachos. And he felt the standard had dropped! Mainly this was due to the bottom of the bowl being sopping wet. This can probably be attributed to their use of fresh salsa, but is still unacceptable. I shall have to investigate at a later date.

you: "at a later date"? I’m surprised you didn’t go tonight!
me: I know. It’s the sort of worrying claim that could be devastating to mankinds current knowledge of quality nacho venues.
you: Eh, yeah. And as an aside, if you see sea slugs roaming the streets then either you or falkirk has problems
me: what a pleasant surprise to find you suggesting it could be one or the other rather than just me
you: yeah that does seem strange doesn’t it. Obviously it’s you that has issues
me: yeah I still hate sea slugs.


Nov 15 2011

Tuesday 15 November 2011: Blast from the past

Through 2004/05 I received 18 postcards similar to this, that was in the days it was Monster Mash rather than Mums.

Pretty much every weekend I wasn’t around, Napoleon, The Teacher, White Lightning and Oz would go for a meal and send me one of the postcards telling me how great it was and how much I was missing out. Quite often they had other insults. Sometimes they had bits of sausage selotaped on. And sometimes they had drawings of wierd animal hybrids. My favourite of these was the Crape: Half crab, half ape. Although the part giraffe part tortoise part club tailed dinosaur was interesting too. They even got the waitresses to write me a couple. My favourite read:

Here we are, three single waitresses waiting for you to one day show up so we can eat sausages and slow dance to Fleetwood Mac or Sade

I did eventually get to go. There was no slow dancing.

This postcard arrived yesterday from Napoleon and Esme. I shall add it to my collection.

And in other news I bought a car today.

you: haha so you did cave in on the price!
me: No. I managed to negotiate a discount
you: go on how much? £500? £600?
me: eh, 75 quid off what they said last night
you: HAHA is that all! Loser
me: better in my pocket than theirs.


Nov 14 2011

Monday 14 November 2011: New lamp

Yesterdays new lamp in action. Exciting stuff.

Wasted an hour at the car dealer as I wasn’t prepared to budge on the price I want to pay. But now I just want the car so will no doubt end up phoning tomorrow at which point the salesman will be laughing his head off at me and I’ll feel like a muppet.

Yet another night when I have done no exercise.

you: you couldn’t get them to budge even a penny?
me: pretty much no.
you: loser!
me: a bit harsh?
you: not at all. All real men can get discounts from car dealers.
me: but they wouldn’t budge at all
you: I wouldn’t budge for a loser either.


Nov 13 2011

Sunday 13 November 2011: Merry christmas.

First chrimbo dinner of the year. £4.25. May they only get better than this one was. Actually for that price it was ok. It was a bit cold though, so I heated it up in the microwave I saw by the juice machine, only later realising it was there for people to warm up baby bottles, not meals from the cafe that weren’t at the desired temperature.

Then we went to ikea. Where we got 3 big picture frames and a desk lamp. How exciting is that? No response? Exactly.

And we have made a car decision. Now if I can get it for the price I want it may feature in a blip this week. With a combined mpg of 58 point something I’ll be able to go out with the camera on speculative trips and not be hacked off if I get nothing.

you: it’s not even mid november
me: 5 points for observation
you: so why on earth are you eating a christmas dinner?
me: it was on the menu
you: not a good enough reason. If dog turd sandwiches were on the menu would you eat that? No.
me: ’tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la, la la, la, la.
you: idiot.


Nov 12 2011

Saturday 12 November 2011: Dale.

When I saw this today it just reminded me of the ruined town at the foot of the lonely mountain. There was no sign of Smaug though.

Test drove a couple of cars today. Either one would be nice, but with one returning 20mpg more than the other one it would certainly be the sensible choice……not sure if we’ll be sensible or not.

you: still reading the hobbit then I take it?
me: yup
you: man you must be a slow reader, you started it ages ago!
me: but I only read a few pages ever day
you: you should try reading somewhere other than on the dunny then
me: perhaps.


Nov 11 2011

Friday 11 November 2011: Waste

Listened to a lot of stuff on the radio and saw a bit of telly today about the service men and women that lost their lives in the great wars and the wars since. I find it quite hard to listen to without welling up. Especially when it’s the old boys (as they are now) talking about how they pretty much lost their childhoods to go and fight in the trenches. Terrifying.

Got a phonecall from Oz today so that was ace to catch up. And it sounds as though they might actually be considering moving back here. Awesome.

Out tonight for beers and a meal with the old work crew. All good.

you: I don’t have much to say today.
me: you and me both matey.


Nov 10 2011

Thursday 10 November 2011: 666…..

…..The beast on tour.

Although I imagine if there was a satan and he decided to go on tour he’d have something a bit more impressive than an old school bus. It would probably be rocket powered and have massive alloys and a hot tub and a big bore exhaust.

Or maybe he cares about the environment and would drive a prius. But I doubt driving a prius would carbon offset the fires of hell, so maybe his first step should be putting them out.

Worked from home this arvo, trying to fill out the mess that is our continual career review process at work.

Got a friendly wee wave this morning though. That made my day.

you: you think satan drives a prius?
me: I don’t think satan drives anything because he doesn’t exist
you: he might
me: he doesn’t
you: I thought I saw him working in KFC
me: well i don’t eat kfc so I wouldn’t see him in there even if he did exist
you: have you realised quite how strange this converstation is?
me: it’s beginning to dawn on me
you: will you delete it?
me: apparently not.


Nov 9 2011

Wednesday 9 November 2011: Thief

Awright where’s the rest of the kitty. There should be a fiver left in there.

Oh. I appear to be using it as a coaster. That’s just the way I roll. Fivers for coasters and tenners for dunny paper. Wouldn’t that be nice?

you: Not really, I think tenners would be a bit scratchy and coarse.
me: actually you’re right. But I think they’d still be better than that foreign money that appears to be made of plastic
you: appears to be worthless you mean
me: ooh get you and your topical "bail out the euro" type comments
you: I just don’t get it. How can italy be 2 trillion euros in debt
me: I have no idea. I don’t get it either.
you: And more importantly: coasters? what kind of poncey git are you. Surely it’s a beer mat
me: oh yeah, not sure where coasters came from
you: maybe it’s the fact you are drinking a poncey southern comfort and lemonade
me: I had a train to catch, leave me alone.


Nov 8 2011

Tuesday 8 November 2011: Nobody puts Stripey in a corner.

That was the day, that was.

More Breaking Bad. Go Walter.

you: getting so desperate for blip fodder you are photographing a cuddly toy some poor bairn has left at your house.
me: He’s not a poor bairn’s. He’s mine.
you: why are you still hanging on to a cuddly toy from your childhood?
me: He’s not from my childhood. The missus got me him when I was about 20
you: are you really admitting that?
me: yeah sure, he’s so cute and has a squishy head.
you: are you really admitting that? I think it’s you who has the squishy head.


Nov 7 2011

Monday 7 November 2011: Effort? Zero

After the effort of yesterdays failed photographic adventure I couldn’t face doing much today. This is the only photo I took all day. It was still given lots of care and consideration though……also known as getting my phone out while cycling along and not even bothering to stop.

We watched some more Breaking Bad tonight. It’s an odd one. Strangely compelling to watch, but never quite sure if I’m actually enjoying it. But the minute one finishes I start the next, so there is certainly something about it. I think I’d go as far as to say I’d recommend it

you: blimey, slow day if you’re talking about tv shows
me: I know. Having just watched 4 series of true blood back to back you’d think I’d be tv’d out
you: nothing else happening?
me: not really. The pea-soup fog has made a re-appearance though.
you: muh-hah-hah-hah
me: not this again. It’s not you and my smoke machine like yesterday
you: awright awright keep yer hair on.


Nov 6 2011

Sunday 6 November 2011: I can’t see anything.

Up at 6 this morning. Drove for an hour to get to a location I wanted to shoot the sunrise. The journey and thought process went a bit like this:
a bit of mist, perfect that’ll look great. Ok it’s getting a bit thicker now….I’m sure it’ll still burn off and look great. Ok I can see about 10 yards in front of the car, I think this would probably be classed as fog. Arrive at location well before sunrise: hmm, not looking good, but once the suns up it’ll soon burn off. 1 hour after what I thought was sunrise time: Ok maybe I read the time wrong. The sun will appear soon. An hour and a half after sunrise. Fook this.

Drove up a hill and it was a glorious day. Freakin typical.

I had a cracking bacon butty at The David Marshall Lodge though. So that almost makes up for 5 fruitless hours, and 25 quid of petrol. Almost.

you: muuh-hah-hah-hah
me: any particular reason for the evil genius laugh?
you: that wasn’t mist that foiled your plans
me: no, I know. It was a full on pea-soup fog.
you: nope, it wasn’t that either
me: you’ve lost me
you: that was the hope this morning but it would appear I failed
me: what are you talking about?
you: I stole your smoke machine from the garage and filled the glen with smoke. Muuh-hah-hah-hah.


Nov 5 2011

Saturday 5 November 2011: Whoosh, bang, whee.

Just imagine that this the awesome firework shot that I had in mind. But I forgot to take my camera.

I got offered 800 quid as the trade in value for the car I paid £24k for 8 years ago. That’s some pretty serious depreciation. I could sell it for more as parts on ebay. But at that price I’m half tempted to keep it, get the engine re-built, and use it as a track day toy.

you: ok I know you’ve forgotten the memory card before
me: aye
you: which is pretty dumb to start with
me: agreed
you: but forgetting the camera, that’s a whole new level!
me: aye. First and last time that happens I hope. I thought my bag was awfully light
you: dumbass.


Nov 4 2011

Friday 4 November 2011: Trail-tastic

My discovery of trails being built in the woods behind my house led to the discovery that there are already over 10km of purpose built mountain bike trails half a mile from my house. Freakin’ awesome. So today I went for a wee ride. The trails are great. It’s a bit of a shame that there isn’t anything technical on them, no jumps or drops or rock gardens. But for an "on my doorstep" facility it’s pretty sweet.

And I cleaned the car inside and out, in the hope that if we make it to any car dealers tomorrow it will up the trade in value if it looks well looked after.

And that was about it really.

you: probably for the best that there’s nothing technical on the trails eh?
me: and why would that be?
you: because you’d just fall off.
me: would not!
you: would too. And not exactly observant are you?
me: why?
you: because you claim to enjoy cycling yet don’t notice 10km of trails under your nose.
me: no, well, there’s a reason for that
you: which is?
me: hang on, I’m thinking…..


Nov 3 2011

Thursday 3 November 2011: In print.

The missus phoned me at work today to tell me that one of my previous blip photos had been used in the Falkirk Herald. I’d sent it in months ago and never got any form of acknowledgement so assumed it had been binned. So it was a nice surprise to see it there.

The missus has written all our christmas cards for this year this evening. I reckon that’s earlier than last year..

And to top it off work ended pretty well.

you: whoop-de-do one of your photos is in the local rag. Big deal
me: today the local rag, tomorrow the world
you: today the local rag, tomorrow used as a fish supper wrapper at the chippy.
me: aye well, whatever, got to start somewhere.
you maybe if you get one in the Scotsman or something I’ll be more impressed
me: I have my doubts
you: and they spelled your name wrong.


Nov 2 2011

Wednesday 2 November 2011: The other end…..

….of the day.

Since yesterdays shot was of the night, I thought todays should be the arrival of the light. Kind of a study of the passing of…..

you: stop right there
me: what?
you: don’t try and fob us off with some arty bu11$h1t.
me: I don’t know what you mean
you: you know fine well you grabbed this shot as you cycled to work and now can’t be bothered doing something better
me: no, it’s a study of the passing of light from one day to the next.
you: shut it!
me: ok ok. Busted.


Nov 1 2011

Tuesday 1 November 2011: Black and Blue

This wasn’t taken at a quarter to midnight. Or even 22:30, or even 20:30, or even 18:30. No, this was taken at 17:42 when I got home. Pitch black already and it’s only just the start of November.

Went out and had my first ever Embo nachos with SB today for lunch. Chicken and chorizo. While initially disappointed with the portion size, the fresh home made salsa was very nice, the cheese was well dispersed throughout the nacho chips, and the chorizo was a nice twist. And by the time I was finished the size was almost right. Almost.

you: has it come to this?
me: what?
you: reviewing nachos?
me: it’s an important public service.
you: you’re talking about cheese dispersion!
me: a very important factor in whether nachos are any good or not, not a lot of people appreciate that fact
you: not a lot of people care.