Jan 31 2011

Monday 31 January 2011: It’s coming back

daylight that is. As I was getting the train through this morning I could see the lovely sunrise and was wishing I was somewhere with a nice view to get a nice shot. But I wasn’t. And by the time I got off the train the best of it had gone, and I didn’t want to walk anywhere. So this was the only shot I took today.

Just done a bit of exercise and that’s it for tonight.

Dad had one of his hips replaced today. I’m hoping with some sort of robot part so he makes a cool robot/hydraulic noise when he moves. I’d be happy enough though if it was just a standard part, and him not to be in pain when he walks. His plan is to be back working by friday, but concedes he may have to wait until after the weekend :-)

you: not like you then?
me: what?
you: I’m pretty sure you’d milk a major op like that for all it was worth
me: well yeah I’d be sure to take the doctors advice to the letter. No strenuous activity for 2 months. You betcha.
you: anything else of note?
me: well, K has handed in her notice which I am glad about. Oh, and yet another freakin plumber has failed to do what they said they would!. I honestly do not understand what is going on. Why can’t they just pick up a phone?
you: I think you must be doing something wrong on the phone. Are you swearing at them? Calling them stupid?
me: none of the above. I think I’m going to take a plumbing course.


Jan 30 2011

Sunday 30 January 2011: Drive home

So, a weekend of ski crew fun over. Up and away fairly sharp this morning. headed out with the camera for a bit, but in the end decided I just wanted to get home. So I did.

Party Boy had a wee portfolio of shots he has taken with his slr on his iphone. I had a good look through them yesterday. He has some superb photos, covering a whole range of subject matter. He has a knack for knowing the right people – or maybe becoming known to them, that gets him some nice opportunities which is ace. But some of his opportunities are pushing the realms of reality. How many people do you know that go to the carribean for a holiday, and meet a russian model who wants fhm style bikini clad sea/sunset frolicking shots taken of them?

Was ordered to wash the car, which was pretty filthy. Then I set about sorting out the photos. I have been (as I tend to be these days) pretty brutal with the culling of them.

you: no way that story about the model is true.
me: yes way. He’d made a properly good job of it too. Setting sun with a bit of fill in flash.
you: sounds like he knows what he’s doing. You should try learning from him
me: I got the names of a couple of books off him that I’m gonna take a look at.
you: Finally we might get some decent shots from you then


Jan 29 2011

Saturday 29 January 2011: Disco switch. Every house should have one.

This was above the bar in the bunkhouse. I liked it.

Most folks went boarding/skiing today. I gave it a miss because of my back still not being right. Sounds like they had a decent day of it though.

I pretty much just went for a nap….that lasted several hours.

Got the industrial size bbq fired up tonight. Stu and I were the cooks. I think we did pushing on for 100 sausages, 90 home made burgers, 50 or so bits of chicken, and maybe 20 steaks. It took a while.

The lasses requested that I get my smoke machine, laser show and disco ball set up. The disco switch just wasn’t cutting it. So the party in a bag was released.

6 beers and a g&t seemed to have no effect. So I went to bed instead.

you: you swapped partying for more sleep
me: yeah I’m not sure how that worked. I think I was asleep more than awake today
you: getting too old for 2 nights in a row of fun?
me: it would appear so
you: that’s quite a sad thing to admit too
me: aye, I guess it is. I think I need an internal disco switch


Jan 28 2011

Friday 28 January 2011: MMMMmmm, tea time

Caught up with Oz this morning. An hour on the phone, I hope he had a cheap rate. Good to hear they are both doing well. The other day it was 42C in Sydney. That is 20C too hot for my liking.

Guess what. The replacement plumber didn’t show either! What is it with plumbers? Are they just not interested in taking my money? Bizarre. And very very annoying.

Got the new tyres fitted to the car, and headed up the road to aviemore for the ski crew weekend.

There were 44 folk in the bunkhouse. A lot of old faces, and quite a few new too. The bunkhouse was pretty cool, it had it’s own bar which we had ample stocks for. Super Saz, the most organised woman on the planet had done her usual sterling job, including a £1k tesco shop. I think she deserves the clubcard points.

Had a cracking night of boozing and catching up. Quality

you: oof, £1k in tesco?!
me: yeah tesco online. It arrived in nearly 50 big plastic crates. And the driver was seemingly quite @rsey about business orders not being allowed and this was our last warning?!
you: but it wasn’t a business order
me: try telling him that.
you: any humorous drunken antics?
me: mmm, not really. I now know that I fit inside the nethy bridge bunkhouse oven though
you: eh, as a result of?
me: climbing in the oven


Jan 27 2011

Thursday 27 January 2011: New Boots….

…..for the car. Again. Only got 6k miles out of the last set, no idea what’s going on. I’m still almost positive the missus doesn’t spend her days doing burnouts in a tesco carpark. Almost positive…..

I made a sly decision last night at the boozer. I noticed on of the ales on tap was 4.7%. Bit strong I decided for a midweek boozeup. So went for the same as the other lads were on. 4 Pints in and I was informed it was a 5%er. The best laid plans, as they say. Or at least they say that here in Scotland.

you: climbing tonight?
me: yeah, my fingers feel red raw.
you: that’ll be as a result of all the excess weight you’re carrying these days. Should maybe cut down of the beer and pies, lardy.
me: oi, watch yer cheek. I’m just a few pounds above my usual weight.
you: which is a few pounds above what it should be
me: you’re cruisin’ for a bruisin’ buddy
you: aye, if you can catch me. Fat boy.


Jan 26 2011

Wednesday 26 January 2011: The Abbotsford

If you know the abbotsford, I reckon you will recognise this dude. I think he might live there, always in his cowboy hat, always with a tool belt on, always with a pair of gloves hanging out of his back pocket, and always in pristine denim and boots. I have no idea who he is or what he does. From now on though I think I shall refer to him as Mr Abbotsford.

First time we’d seen White Lightning this year which was grand, even if he is still partially deaf after his unexplained perforated eardrum.

Popped in to Fopp at lunchtime and left having spent £3 on a double cd of french cafe songs, or something like that, featuring the likes of Edith Piaf

you: that was 3 quid well spent then
me: yup
you: Sarcasm!
me: I thought it might have been, but decided to ignore it, as it was in fact £3 well spent
you: in what possible way was spending 3 quid on cd(s) you don’t understand money well spent?
me: 2 words, la mer.
you: the sea?
me: yup, somewhere under the sea, in french, with some old dude crooning it. That’s 3 quid right there
you: hmm, I beg to differ
me: ok so how about a song titled "Ah! So you know my chicken"
you: that sounds like value for money, but I fear it’s not the right title
me: so you are calling google translate a liar?
you: well no, I think you probably typed it in wrong.


Jan 25 2011

Tuesday 25 January 2011: Orange stem

Not very often we get an orange still with a stalk on it in our fruit and veg box that gets delivered.

And there you have it. The highlight of my day.

Finally spent the remainder of the gift card I was given when I left my old team at work, just over a year ago. I got a head torch.

you: an orange with a stalk was the highlight of your day?
me: mmm, I’m afraid so.
you: blimey and I thought I had a bad day!
me: I imagine your day was fairly similar to mine
you: what are you talking about? I’ve been kite surfing, base jumping, and fed a baby albino koala.
me: an albino koala. Nice. I don’t believe you though
you: makes a change from me not believing you I suppose


Jan 24 2011

Monday 24 January 2011: Time’s up.

Literally. I’ve had enough of trying to get the shot I wanted. This isn’t it. If I have to turn an egg times once more and not get a boiled egg at the end of it I think I’ll cry. If I’d had a boiled egg for every time I’d turned it it would have been like that scene in Cool Hand Luke.

Comment from the missus on yesterdays blip "Stop being so self indulgent and get over yourself". I think that, as they say, is me told.

Comment from the missus today on the new exhaust. "It sounds louder than it did when it had the hole in"

Comment from the missus today on what I should blip. "I think you should blip an egg timer". Great, 3 minutes I though, blip done. Try an hour!

you: an hour for this?!
me: yup. I’m as shocked as you. I just couldn’t, and haven’t, get it lined up right.
you: and you now sound like a boy racer in the car?
me: it would appear so
you: and you’re how much too old to be a boy racer?
me: oh, fifteen years. When the missus was putting the car away I got her to give it a blip on the throttle
you: and?
me: it popped and banged on the overrun. And put a smile on my face.
you: saddo


Jan 23 2011

Sunday 23 January 2011: Emergency blip time

Out for a bit of lunch at Behind the Wall with Jenelope and the missus. Home. Telly. Phonecalls.

Not really feeling it today. Might just go to bed.

you: not really feeling what exactly?
me: I dunno. Just…..it
you: feeling sick?
me: not particularly. Don’t feel quite right though
you: stressed then?
me: not really
you: unhappy?
me: I don’t do happy
you: mmm, true.
me: ok doctor you. What’s your diagnosis?
you: It would appear you have a vitamin ‘it’ deficiency
me: the cure?
you: go to bed.
me: good.


Jan 22 2011

Saturday 22 January 2011: broom broom

Got the new stainless exhaust fitted today. It is now the shiniest thing about my car by a long way. And I paid someone to fit it. Me! I paid someone to do a job that I could have done but would have taken me 5 times as long and given me no end of headaches. Wow. I’m learning. And he only charged me £30. Bloomin’ bargain.

Wandered down in to town with the missus and jenelope. Went for the best £3.50 lasagne I’ve ever had.

The girls finished the latest jigsaw, "corner shop", which had to be sponsored by cadbury the number of times their sign appears.

And apart from that we have watched a lot of telly, and had a lovely bit of fillet steak for tea.

you: on the fillet steak again? That’s 2 weeks in a row,
me: yeah, significantly cheaper this week though.
you: And does the success with the exhaust mean you’re gonna hang up your tools and give up on the diy approach
me: I don’t think I’d go that far. But I’ll certainly give more consideration to getting pro’s to do stuff
you: blimey, wonders will never cease!


Jan 21 2011

Friday 21 January 2011: Meet Stanley

I asked for a new stanley knife for christmas. Jenelope arrived with it today, and it’s the blingiest tool I think I have ever seen. It’s full name is a Stanley Fat Max XL. All it’s missing is "turbo mega hyper" and it wouldn’t just be the blingiest, but the best named.

Fixed the weather station this arvo, so now the wind is no longer permanently from the south.

The freakin’ gas man who didn’t come out last friday as he was ill had promised to be out first thing today. I even phoned last night to confirm he was coming. He’s a no show. Again. Think it’s time to move elsewhere with my custom. Agh it makes me mad.

you: Ok fair enough, I’m not going to stick up for him this week
me: good. It’s terrible service as far as I’m concerned. How do these people keep in business?
you: I have no idea. So have you got an exciting weekend planned since Jenelope has come to visit?
me: think I might get her to clean my windows, maybe mop the floors.
you: it’s Jenelope, not Cinderella.


Jan 20 2011

Thursday 20 January 2011: A day late

One of the guys in the office got a telescope over chrimbo and I’ve been talking to him about it, so decided to take a shot of the moon. I know it was full moon last night, and I did take a shot. But I’d already blipped.

It’s no wonder I fell off my bike yesterday, I walked back over the same path today and could barely stand on it.

Good climb tonight. Bumped in to one of the guys that was on my course at uni for 4 years, and who I haven’t seen in 11 years. I like randomly bumping in to people that a) I can remember the names of and b) I am happy to say hello to and have a wee blether.

Brothers and sisters starts again tonight. hurrah. An american drama I don’t mind watching. And not just ’cause sally fields is in it

you: Sally Fields?! She’s ancient!
me: so? I still like her. And joanna lumley
you: Lumley?! You have got to be kidding me?
me: why would I?
you: I think I’m gonna barf. I no longer want to be associated with you
me: see you tomorrow then?
you: I guess.


Jan 19 2011

Wednesday 19 January 2011: Rubbish…..

…..start to the day. I fell off my bike and tore a hole in my new work trousers. Grrrr.

Managed to post the letters that had been proving problematic. I spent ages walking too and from a post office miles away, but to me that is better than standing in a queue.

Tonight I shall do a bit of exercise and finish sorting out the storage bins I got from aldi for the garage.

you: falling off your bike drunk on the way to work. That’s novel
me: at what point did I say I was drunk?
you: just an assumption
me; well you assumed wrong. I hit some black ice
you: It was like 4C this morning. No way you hit ice
me: well that’s what I thought too. Which was why I was surprised when I thought "this next bit of tar looks a bit odd, kind of icy….." thud. And I was skidding along on the ground
you: drunk.
me: I was not drunk. I was just glad the section I fell off on wasn’t one of the ones covered in dog $h1t. I hate dog owners that let their mutts crap on paths, or crap in general and don’t pick it up.
you: I’m sure we’ve had this rant before. Next your going to say it’s just as bad when they pick it up then throw the bag up a tree
me: It’s just as bad…..oh.


Jan 18 2011

Tuesday 18 January 2011: Gardening

Just a shop window on multrees walk. As I walked through to get to the post office it caught my eye. So I blipped it as I walked back, with my unposted letters. Why does everyone have to go to the post office when I want to go. Or more specifically why do retired people have to go at lunchtime, when they could go at any time during the day? Anyway, for the second day in a row the queue was too big. I made more of an effort today. I even took a number ticket, and went to poundland to waste some time. Came back and there were still 20 people to go. One more day like that and I’m binning the letters.

Met a new estate agent up at the old house as we are considering moving agents. He reckons we need to put it on at quite a lot less than we originally hoped. Decisions decisions. Sell or try and rent. Sell was always the plan. Probably best to stick to it.

you: how much did you spend in poundland?
me: not a penny
you: no way? You must have bought some cheap tatty tools?
me: nope. I did take a look at them though. Nothing took my fancy
you: you feeling ok? And binning the letters probably isn’t the best plan. Why not just buy some stamps?
me: They need to be recorded.
you: probably even more of a reason not to bin them really


Jan 17 2011

Monday 17 January 2011: Forgotten purchases are the best.

I had completely forgotten I’d pre-ordered this album before christmas. So it was like getting a present when I found an unexpected parcel when I got home. Some ace songs on it and a lovely voice as usual. I suppose it would be a bit weird if she had a lovely voice on the previous albums then sounded like she smoked 40 a day on the third.

Bit of exercise. Bit of tea. Bit of telly. Job’s a good un’.

you: forget you buy a lot of things do you?
me: oh yeah loads. When I order gadgets from Hong Kong that take ages to turn up I never remember I have ordered them
you: and does this not suggest that perhaps you are ordering stuff you don’t need
me: oh no I need it. I just can’t remember having ordered them, or what I needed them for
you: I’ll repeat. You are ordering things you don’t need.
me: Ok I’ll concede that I need them at the time
you: so basically you’re trigger happy with the CC details
me: most certainly
you: perhaps you ought to do something about that
me:…..sorry….what…..I got distracted by a remote control flying goldfish so I just had to order it.


Jan 16 2011

Sunday 16 January 2011: Mmm, breakfast.

I’ve stayed places where we have had free champagne for breakfast. Never stayed somewhere that there was free vodka before. That’s glasgow for you.

It was pretty good as hotel breakfasts go. A good fry up, and a good continental section, and of course the "bloody mary station. adults only please".

Had breakfasts, then ended up lying on the couch in the room watching something for the weekend.

The taxi driver home from the station had a jazz cd on. I almost had to ask him to stop to let us out as it was awful. Then again he was driving so slowly I could have jumped out. And he had eyebrows. Not just eyebrows, but eyebrows. I would have been proud to have either one of them as a moustache. If I wanted a moustache.

you: so how many bloody mary’s did you have?
me: none. But I had about 6 gallons of orange juice, as that was my excuse to keep going up to try and get a decent blip.
you: well that didn’t work.
me: hmmm, no. It was nice OJ though.
you: so did you get home without the missus finding out about yesterday’s ‘fancy lady’ from yer blip?
me: yup. phew. Though the guilt may linger……. I can’t take it. I’m going to have to tell her.
you: not sure referring to yer missus as ‘fancy’ is acceptable.
me: well, we’ll find out when she reads this.


Jan 15 2011

Saturday 15 January 2011: Dangerous liaisons

Tonight I am spending the night in a fancy hotel with a fancy lady, having been out for a fancy tea.

Watched toy story 3 this arvo. Mainly because the weather was horrible, and the hotel had a fairly cool free video on demand service.

Then we went out for tea at the Pelican Cafe, which we thoroughly enjoyed last time. And thoroughly enjoyed again.

I got us moved from the first room we were in as there was an amazingly annoying drip onto a protruding ledge of the window frame. It was like chinese water torture. The second room was the same. What a stupid window design

you: oh yeah, cause you are a world famous window designer
me: if I was I wouldn’t design something that would get dripped on and be annoying
you: of course you wouldn’t. What was I thinking.
me: I have no idea.
you: does your missus know you are spending evenings in fancy hotels with fancy ladies?
me: I guess so.
you: and let me guess, you booked in under the name of smith to protect your anonymity?
me: how did you know?!


Jan 14 2011

Friday 14 January 2011: Fancy

So my fancy notebook arrived. Now I just need to think of something fancy to write in it.

A day of waiting in on a tradesman that didn’t arrive. Why can’t they just pick up the phone to say they are sorry but they’re not gonna make it out. Ok he was at home with the flu. But….

you: but nothing you miserable git. The man’s at home ill. Give him a break
me: ok ok. In this instance I’ll cut him some slack.
you: very big of you. Do anything else?
me: I started getting my home automation stuff up and running. The interface that’s an old serial thing worked with my usb convertor which was ace
you: ok I’ll be more specific. Anything else interesting?
me: eh, I put the christmas tree in the loft
you: that’s a no then.


Jan 13 2011

Thursday 13 January 2011: Little n’ Large

Blurry-cam, ah ah, distorts every one of us. (to the flash gordon theme)

First climb of the new year today. It was good. Just went through to Stirling as it’s warmer there. Every machine in the gym was in use. I guess that’s the new years resolutions still in effect, a whole 2 weeks in to the new year. Now that’s dedication.

Been sorting out the house insurance. I hate insurance of all kinds. It’s a rip off. You have to have it, yet you never use it, as you know the second you make a claim your premiums will go up forever more.

"ok sir that’s all your details in, so your insurance will be £340.95."
at this point I said I wanted to change something. He didn’t like this
"oh, I’ll have to speak to my supervisor"
cue 5 minutes of hold music
"I’m sorry sir we can’t cover you at the price I gave you, it’s going to be £340.96, is that ok"
Are you kidding me? You’ve just had me on hold for 5 minutes for the sake of a penny? It’s cost way more than that in your wages. Bizarre.

you: you don’t use your insurance when you need to?
me: nope. Not if I can scrape together enough cash to replace/fix whatever’s broken
you: that’s ridiculous.
me: yeah well I’m not the only one. We were talking about it at the boozer last night.
you: well your all as bad as each other then


Jan 12 2011

Wednesday 12 January 2011: Freestylin’

This is the latest craze for teenagers. Hiding inside giant wheelie bins and doing awesome tricks. Spotted this kid doing this full on endo while I was out for a wander at lunchtime.

Alternatively I have absolutely no idea how this bin ended up balanced in this position.

This morning was one of the most miserable I can remember. A fresh layer of snow, turned to slush, with quite a heavy drizzle falling. I was thinking this as a car started on someone’s driveway. 30 seconds later I moved off the road where I was walking to let it past. And it stopped alongside me. And the lady in it rolled down the window (do we still ‘roll’ down windows even though they are electric?), and asked if I was going to the station, and if so did I want a lift. Thank you very much Tammy the South African lady. It was very much appreciated.

you: not like you to get in a car with a stranger, especially with terrible road conditions
me: I know, and that’s exactly what I thought as we started approaching the main road junction, on a downhill slope, where I have seen plenty of idiots approach it in snowy conditions as if it’s the height of summer and slide straight out into the road.
you: oh oh.
me: and then she started gently braking, about 100 yards from the junction
you: was that a sigh of relief I just heard?
me: sure was. Thanks again, Tammy the South African lady.


Jan 11 2011

Tuesday 11 January 2011: green lady and the moon

So from this shot we can ascertain that

1. the digital zoom is terrible on my phone
2. i wasn’t really in blip mode today
3. the moon wasn’t where I wanted it to be
4. the moon wasn’t crescent enough for what I wanted to do.

Ah well. Just one of those days.

Bro in law came round for a bit of tea. And I found some electronic components that might come in useful. Oh, and found out that one of the guys I work with did his degree in electrical engineering. Could come in useful knowing a man like that.

you: not a very interesting day then?
me: ach just a run of the mill day really.
you: and that’s it? Nothing more to add?
me: well I haven’t mastered my long range road salt spreading throw with the snow shovel yet.
you: I wish I hadn’t asked


Jan 10 2011

Monday 10 January 2011: Right….

…..maybe. Away back in august I blipped these grapes and ever since they have been hanging from a spare tripod waiting for the day when I really couldn’t find anything else to blip. Today is that day.

I much prefer this version. Last time I just didn’t like what I got.

Anyway, carrying on from thursday afternoon’s "almost enjoying work shock", I just kept my head down and wrote some more code, and almost enjoyed work…..again! Long may it continue, though I fear it won’t.

Read up a bit more on electronics gubbins. I have some ideas in the pipeline.

you: "electronics gubbins" and "ideas in the pipeline" sounds like it has house fire written all over it.
me: no no, it’ll be fine.
you: maybe best not to mention it to the insurance company though eh? Oh, did you hear back from the house viewers from last week
me: Yeah, apparently the rooms are too small
you: and are they?
me: well we lived there happily for 10 years. So no.
you: ach well, back to shelling out cash for council tax and boilers and mortgage payments and things for the house you can’t sell eh.
me: looks like it. Thanks for cheering me up. Did I mention I feel ropey tonight?
you: no, but it’ll be all this "almost enjoying work" malarky. Yer body can’t cope.


Jan 9 2011

Sunday 9 January 2011: Quiet ice is dangerous ice…….

……absolutely nothing to do with the photo, but something dad said on the phone when talking about the frozen loch. Apparently it’s a pretty old saying, but I hadn’t heard it, he hadn’t heard it until recently, but we both liked it.

So this is the contraption that made my 300th possible. I thought I’d record it for posterity.

Today has been another fairly lazy day. I cleared the drive and road of snow. I replaced the batteries in my weather station which involved getting the big ladders out to get to the roof. Cold weather + metal ladders = cold hands. Oh, and I had a nap. Interesting stuff eh?

you: what the hell is that?!
me: I told you already, it’s the camera timer trigger I made
you: looks a bit heath robinson to me.
me: hmm yeah. I do intend to solder it up properly on some blank pcb’s I bought
you: and the chances of that actually happening?
me: hmm, about the same as of me soldering up the laser trigger I made, which is now dismantled and I can’t remember how I got working
you: yup, I figured as much.


Jan 8 2011

Saturday 8 January 2011: It’s back…..

….the snow that is. 4 or 5 inches of the bl00dy stuff this morning. A bit more tonight. As a result I only left the house to see what state the main road was in.

So this afternoon I fired up the good stereo and sat in the sunshine in the back room. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I should listen to music properly more often. I tend to just listen to and enjoy the tune, and if I pick up some of the lyrics then that’s a bonus.

I’ve eaten well today. 3 slices of toast with beans and sweet chilli sauce for lunch. Then for tea 2 slices of toast with fried egg and brown sauce, and 2 slices of toast with cheese and tomato chilli chutney.

Yesterdays 300th blip briefly made the spotlight page today. I have zero idea how that works. It seemed to go on and disappear really quickly, yet others have been on there all day. Ach well, it was nice to see it there for a wee while

you: ever heard the saying "variety is the spice of life"?
me: yup
you: ever think of applying it to your diet?
me: I did. Beans, egg and cheese.
you: was there really nothing else for you to eat?
me: not really. As it was I had to pick mould off each and every slice of bread before toasting it.
you: euch gross!
me: nah, not really.
you: eh, yes, really.


Jan 7 2011

Friday 7 January 2011: x2 = 300

So. 300th blip. 300th in a row. Am I pleased? Yeah I guess I am. I actually took almost 400 pictures today, with the intention of having 300 of me in my blip, but I had too many with overlap, and it was just soooo time consuming.

I think I perhaps went a bit far anyway. I built a timer trigger for the camera. it fired the shutter once every 2.5 seconds. Every time it triggered the shutter it flashed an LED, so that I could keep in sync even when I couldn’t hear the shutter. And once 300 shots had been taken it lit another led to let me know.

you: happy blipday to you, happy blipday to you…..
me: thanks. I made the missus sing it to. Perhaps premature, maybe I should wait until 365.
you: She pleased to sing a random song for a random blip based event?
me: Not really. She is even less happy that I’ve spent the whole evening compositing 150 images of myself
you: I don’t think I’d be pleased with you either
me: well you normally aren’t anyway.
you: very true. I have one further comment to make on your construction of a trigger. Idiot. You can buy them.
me: but I only decided what I was going to do yesterday. So I built one.
you: well, whatever. At least you seem to have found a hobby you are sticking to.


Jan 6 2011

Thursday 6 January 2011: Shiney shiney

New exhaust arrived for the car. A nice wee stainless steel job. I have decided I am not going to fit it myself. I’m going to repeat that as I don’t quite believe what I have just written. I have decided that I am not going to try and fit it myself. Euch. I feel dirty saying that.

I very nearly enjoyed work today. Well this afternoon anyway. I got to write some code that I am fairly sure won’t be thrown away in 5 minutes because someone changes their mind about what they actually want. Ooh, the novelty.

Sat with Fat Mungo on the train tonight after a bit of text ping pong to work out where we were. "Opposite the pumpkin" didn’t help me much.

you: you got some strange illness? Enjoying work and not attempting to do something that was bound to go wrong or take you a whole weekend?
me: yeah I feel ok. But I agree. It’s very strange.
you: anything else happen?
me: yeah. All week I have been meaning to talk to the solicitor to tell them we’re taking the old house off the market, but hadn’t got round to it. Then today she phones me to say someone wants to view it.
you: that’s good is it not.
me: It is if they buy it. But if you walked in to a house that was sub zero on the inside, with a bust boiler that needs fixed, would you be interested?
you: not likely
me: and there lies my concern.
you: well, fingers crossed anyway.


Jan 5 2011

Wednesday 5 January 2011: Old friend

First wednesday jar of the new year tonight. And we went back to our old haunt. It was nice. Like sinking into your favourite armchair after sitting on a canteen seat for months. Mmmmm. And it is also cheaper than the ghillie, which shouldn’t be hard, but for some reason appears to be.

Met JJ for lunch. Going in to pret a manger makes me feel nauseous. Not because it’s bad, but man it’s so expensive!

you: Did you manage to wear matching shoes today?
me: I did. i set them out last night
you: thinking ahead. That’s a novelty.
me: Kipped on the couch again last night
you: eh, why?
me: just having real trouble getting to sleep at the moment. The last three nights I have fallen asleep to disney’s Beauty and the Beast playing on the laptop
you: I don’t know what to say to that.
me: There must be more than this provincial life?
you: I assume that’s some quote or other
me: Yeah. From the first song.
you: Any particular reason for the film selection?
me: eh, not really. I thought something with songs in would be more relaxing than guns and explosions.
you: hmm. There is logic there. Somewhere.


Jan 4 2011

Tuesday 4 January 2011: First day of a new work year….

…..and I turn up in odd shoes. Nice. It was dark when I put them on, then jumped on the bike. The second I got off the bike at the station I thought something felt odd. Once nice and new, one scabby and old.

I ordered myself a Black n’ Red notebook.

And that’s it for today.

you: odd socks too by the looks of things.
me: yeah, I don’t mind that though.
you: and what’s the point of you buying a nice notebook, your writing is atrocious
me: I just fancied one. Maybe I can improve my writing
you: I don’t fancy your chances much, especially as you got sent for remedial handwriting classes at school and that didn’t work
me: I was only 15
you: haha I bet your mates got a good laugh out of that! Was work as bad as expected today?
me: I didn’t really expect it to be bad, just meh. And it was. And I don’t even like "meh", but it seems to fit
you: I think that’s what it’s for


Jan 3 2011

Monday 3 January 2011: ‘Orse Poo.

Basically that captures my opinion of this being the last day of my holidays perfectly. I wish I’d taken a few more days off. I wish I didn’t have to go back full stop. Which isn’t like me. Normally I’m not fussed about going back to work after holidays, as in general I enjoy it. Today though I am fussed.

And to make me even cheerier it’s windy and cold.

We finished off the jigsaw we were doing though….except for the piece the cat has stolen and hidden.

you: blimey you’re a bundle of joy today
me: makes a nice change eh
you: hmm, yeah. Nothing of interest done today?
me: we went for breakfast lunch to ‘Salt of the Earth". In general I am averse to going there, as while the meat is always cooked perfectly, the portion sizes are a joke, and even though there are piles of reviews saying so the management don’t seem to take any notice.
you: and was it any different today?
me: yeah it was fine today, as we had the 2 courses for a tenner deal.


Jan 2 2011

Sunday 2 January 2011: Swamp gifts

Each year Fat Mungo’s kids give us a chrimbo present. Each year Fat Mungo comments "what do you buy the man who has everything"? Each year he finds something I don’t have. Often tool based. Always appreciated.

And this is this years. Electric scissors. They came in that plastic packaging everyone hates. The kind that you feel fortunate to get in to without cutting yourself. Why is it used? Everyone hates it. This packaging though was the first I have ever seen with at least a nod given in the direction of making access possible without having to wear wire mesh gloves. It had a small pull tab with a V of perforations leading away from it. It didn’t work.

you: I wonder if anyone has ever died from opening packaging?
me: I think there is a fair chance at least a singular wrists has been slit. "there i’ve got a wee tear in it…..pullllll…..I appear to be gushing blood"
you: shame you didn’t have the electric scissors to hand really
me: that’s where the random scissors in yesterday’s blip came in.


Jan 1 2011

Saturday 1 January 2011: Tradition

A traditional swamp hogmanay was had. Champagne? Check. Board game? Check. After Eights? Check. Child safe scissors? Eh, check. It was great fun as ever. We lost the board game, as ever.

The only thing that was wrong was the cousin wasn’t singing on telly for the bells. It just wasn’t the same without getting the usual "hang on that’s my cousin singing on bbc1 at midnight on hogmanay" surprise. Still I imagine I’ll survive.

So, new years resolutions. Utterly pointless, but I may as well have one. I’m going to do my best to not have stress levels utterly disproportionate to the thing/event that I am stressing about. That sounds like a plan

you: fairly dull resolution
me: so what’s yours?
you: I fully intend to ridicule you at every available opportunity
me: same as last year then
you: hang on I’m not finished. To put you down at every opportunity
me: still no change.
you: still not finished. And rarely I will throw in something positive, just to astound you
me: and astounded I shall be.